Baby Cullen’s C.V.

KANA EDYTHE CULLEN

Goal: Week-old baby seeks position requiring no particular skills.

Education: None. Not a drop.

Experience: Nine months gestation.

Skills: As mentioned, none in particular. Can see, hear and flail. Recent acquisition of ability to extract milk from breast. Proven proficiency in hiccups.

Salary requirements:

How to escape your crushing mortgage

Here’s the beginning of that story I mentioned yesterday:

Nearly 9% of all U.S. mortgages–or 4.8 million loans–are past due or in some stage of foreclosure. So when a company claims to offer distressed homeowners both relief from their mortgages and revenge against the bankers who saddled them with too much debt (“Give the lenders back

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