Why the ’80s? The decade was all about money, introducing the world to the yuppie and crack, along with film characters like Tony Montana and Gordon Gekko, who seemed to coin slogans about money, wealth, capitalism, and, most memorable of all, greed, every other time they spoke. (We were supposed to be reintroduced to Mr. Gekko this week with Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps, but the film’s release was pushed off to the fall.)
Money was a favorite obsession in the ’80s, and it came through on film. Richard Pryor was sold off as a child’s plaything in one movie (The Toy), and given $300 million just for wasting $30 million in another (Brewster’s Millions). Tom Cruise was always starring as a cocky entrepreneurial type on the hunt a quick way to get rich in the likes of Cocktail, Risky Business, and Rain Man. It was a decade when you could inherit millions only if you swore off booze, smoking, and other vices (Easy Money), and when the whims of the wealthy and powerful could instantly transform rich to poor, and vice versa, a la Trading Places.
So perhaps I wasn’t wasting my time watching all those movies back in my formative years. Maybe I was learning something about money, and how the business world works. So, with the help of the Internet Movie Database and MovieQuotes.com, here are some kernels of wisdom and amusement from ’80s movies, for those who as obsessed about money as anyone was three decades ago. I posted the first half yesterday, and here are the other 40 quotes, including the most famous Gekko-ism of all.
The Color of Money
“Money won is twice as sweet as money earned.” –Eddie Felson (Paul Newman)
Youngblood
“You know what Gordie Howe got for a signing bonus? A team jacket!” –Coach (Ed Lauter)
“Lousy agent!” –Derek Sutton (Patrick Swayze)
Full Metal Jacket
“Fifteen dollar too beaucoup. Five dollars each… Five dollars is all my mom allows me to spend.” –Private Joker (Matthew Modine), negotiating with a prostitute
Field of Dreams
“Ray, people will come Ray. They’ll come to Iowa for reasons they can’t even fathom. They’ll turn up your driveway not knowing for sure why they’re doing it. They’ll arrive at your door as innocent as children, longing for the past. Of course, we won’t mind if you look around, you’ll say. It’s only $20 per person. They’ll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for it is money they have and peace they lack.” –Terence Mann (James Early Jones)
Cocktail
“You outwork, outthink, outscheme and outmanuever. You make no friends. You trust nobody. And you make damn sure you’re the smartest guy in the room whenever the subject of money comes up.” –Uncle Pat (Ron Dean)
This Is Spinal Tap
“Money talks, and bulls*** walks.” –Bobbi Flekman (Fran Drescher)
Big
“How would you like that?” –Bank teller, looking at Josh’s paycheck of $187.30
“Three dimes, a hundred dollar bill and 87 ones.” –Josh (Tom Hanks)
Ghostbusters
“Personally, I liked working for the university. They gave us money and facilities. We didn’t have to produce anything. You’ve never been out of college. You don’t know what it’s like out there! I’ve worked in the private sector … they expect results!” –Ray (Dan Aykroyd)
Scarface
“You know what capitalism is? Getting f*****!” –Tony Montana (Al Pacino)
The Blues Brothers
“Oh, yeah, $200, and you boys drank $300 worth of beer.” –Bob, of Bob’s Country Bunker, discussing the band’s pay
Rain Man
“I’m not greedy. I just want my half.” –Charlie (Tom Cruise)
48 Hours
“Class isn’t something you buy. Look at you … you’ve got on a 500-dollar suit and you’re still a low-life.” –Jack (Nick Nolte)
The Untouchables
“Somebody steals from me, I’m gonna say you stole. Not talk to him for spitting on the sidewalk. Understand?” –Al Capone (Robert De Niro)
Trading Places
“I had the most absurd nightmare. I was poor and no one liked me.” –Louis Winthorpe III (Dan Aykroyd)
Tootsie
“I don’t believe in hell. I believe in UNEMPLOYMENT, but not hell.” –Michael Dorsey (Dustin Hoffman)
Ruthless People
“If you can’t afford it, F***ING FINANCE IT!” –Ken Kessler (Judge Reinhold)
Can’t Buy Me Love
“Didn’t you take economics? You could have had me for $49.95.” –Transfer student to Ronald Miller (Patrick Dempsey)
Caddyshack
“It’s easy to grin / When your ship comes in / And you’ve got the stock market beat. / But the man worthwhile, / Is the man who can smile, / When his shorts are too tight in the seat.” –Judge Smalls (Ted Knight)
Airplane
“Hey, you know what they say: See a broad to get dat booty yak ’em, leg ‘er down a smack ’em yak ’em.” –Jive dudes
Field of Dreams
“Man, I did love this game. I’d have played for food money… I used to love travelling on the trains from town to town. The hotels… brass spittoons in the lobbies, brass beds in the rooms. It was the crowd, rising to their feet when the ball was hit deep. Shoot, I’d play for nothing!” –Shoeless Joe Jackson (Ray Liotta)
Bachelor Party
“Rick, I want Debbie. You dump her and I’ll give you cash. Ten thousand dollars, plus a G.E. toaster over; a Litton microwave; a Cuisinart; Michelin tires, brand new; a set of Sears’ best metric tools.” –Cole (Robert Prescott)
Spaceballs
“Merchandising, merchandising, where the real money from the movie is made.” –Yogurt (Mel Brooks)
Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure
“I wouldn’t sell my bike for all the money in the world. Not for a hundred million, trillion, billion dollars!” –Pee-Wee (Paul Reubens)
The Three Amigos
“No dough, no show.” –Lucky Day (Steve Martin)
Johnny Dangerously
“You tell me another gang that’s got a dental plan.” –Johnny (Michael Keaton)
Wall Street
“The main thing about money, Bud, is that it makes you do things you don’t want to do.” –Lou Mannheim (Hal Holbrook)
Trading Places
“We seem to be paying some of our employees an awful lot of money.” –Mortimer Duke (Don Ameche)
“Can’t get around the old minimum wage, Mortimer.” –Louis Winthorpe III (Dan Aykroyd)
Better Off Dead
“I want my TWO DOLLARS!” –Johnny, the paper boy
The Breakfast Club
“Did you work for the money to buy those earrings? Or did your Daddy buy those for you?” – John Bender (Judd Nelson) to Claire (Molly Ringwald)
Blue Velvet
“Heineken? F*** that s***! Pabst Blue Ribbon!” –Frank Booth (Dennis Hopper)
Caddyshack
“And I say, ‘Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know.’ And he says, ‘Oh, uh, there won’t be any money. But when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness.’ So I got that goin’ for me, which is nice.” –Carl (Bill Murray)
Tootsie
“OK, I know this is going to disgust you, Michael, but a lot of people are in this business to make money.” –George Fields (Sydney Pollack)
Better Off Dead
“This is pure snow! Do you have any idea what the street value of this mountain is?” –Charles De Mar (Curtis Armstrong)
Stripes
“Where’s the great pay? Where’s the travel? Where’s the Winnebago, Goddamnit!” –Russell Ziskey (Harold Ramis)
The Secret of My Success
“What you’ve got is college experience, not the practical, hard-nosed business experience we’re looking for. If you’d joined our training program out of high-school, you’d be qualified for this job now.” –Unnamed employer
“Then why did I go to college?” –Brantley Foster (Michael J. Fox)
Fast Times at Ridgemont High
“You need money” –Brad Hamilton (Judge Reinhold)
“All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and I’m fine” –Jeff Spicoli (Sean Penn)
Sixteen Candles
“We have seventy dollars and a pair of girls underpants. We’re safe as kittens.” –The Geek (Anthony Michael Hall)
The Toy
“If you want a friend, you don’t buy a friend, Eric, you earn a friend through love and trust and respect.” – Jack Brown (Richard Pryor)
Risky Business
“My name is Joel Goodson. I deal in human fulfillment. I grossed over eight thousand dollars in one night.” –Joel (Tom Cruise)
Wall Street
“Greed, for lack of a better word, is good.” – Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas)