Ezra Klein writes, regarding Sarah Palin’s cap-and-trade op-ed in today’s Washington Post, that its failure to mention “global warming” or “climate change” makes it “a bit like an op-ed that attacks firefighters for pointing pressurized water cannon(s) at everything but never mentions fires.” I’m not absolutely sure the analogy is fair, but this did sound like an op-ed I would really like to read. So I took some key passages from Palin’s piece and converted them:
I am deeply concerned about the continued use by firefighters nationwide of pressurized water cannons, and I believe it is an enormous threat to our economy. It would undermine our recovery over the short term and would inflict permanent damage.
American prosperity has always been driven by the steady supply of dry, habitable dwellings. Particularly in Alaska, we understand the inherent link between dry shelter and prosperity, dry shelter and opportunity, and dry shelter and security. Consequently, many of us in this huge if dry-shelter-poor state recognize that the continued pointing of high-pressure water cannons at commercial and residential structures would adversely affect every aspect of the U.S. economy.
There is no denying that as the world becomes more industrialized, we need to reform our shelter policy and become less dependent on non-waterproof buildings. But the answer doesn’t lie in making buildings wetter! Those who understand the issue know we can meet our dry-shelter needs and environmental challenges without destroying America’s economy.
I find this strangely convincing. Somebody needs to rein in those crazy firefighters!
