Tough choice for moms: less pay vs. less time

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In the Cullen household, Mother’s Day is known as Sunday. As in the day Mommy does the laundry, the food-shopping and cooks a big batch of something we eat until we’re sick of and throw out the following Sunday. As in the day Daddy plays a matinee and sometimes a concert. Oh, I bet I’ll get a funny card or two, and my sisters are plotting a way to get us out for a kid-free lunch. But Sundays are precious in my work-jammed week, and the laundry doesn’t do itself.

A new CareerBuilder survey says 43% of working moms would take a pay cut if it meant they could spend more time with their kids. Over a third would be willing to give up 10% or more. And 51% of working moms whose significant other also works say they’d leave their job if the S.O. made enough money to support the entire family.

Me, it’s not so simple. It’s not so much that I need more face time with my kid and kid-to-be. There’s only so long one can keep up one’s end of a running metaphysical dialogue on who’s more scared of who, the lion or the bear. It’s just that I need more time. More time to look at color swatches for my little girl’s new room. More time to clear the yard of basset poo. More time to pay bills, sort photos, try out that new recipe for Thai noodles.

CareerBuilder says “more than 25% of working moms are dissatisfied with their work/life balance.” It suggests these five steps toward a better balance; the second one might not have occurred to you, while the others seem to presume working moms lack working brain cells (no, really, we’re trying not to slow down or share responsibilities).

1. Sell your boss on a more flexible work schedule – Start by contacting your human resources department or consulting the employee manual to determine whether your company has a telecommuting program already in place. If one exists, you can build your proposal on actual policies.

2. Keep one calendar – Unfortunately it’s often easier to cancel on your child than on a potential client. Scheduling business and family obligations on the same calendar will lessen your chances of forgetting a
personal commitment when you’re planning work activities. It will also help you avoid over-scheduling and alert you if your commitments are unbalanced.

3. Make time for family – Schedule activities for only your family on the weekends and when possible during the week. Also, try to schedule a few minutes each day to call your children to talk about their school day as well as plans for the evening.

4. Slow down – Stop and enjoy the activities and people around you, both inside and outside the office. Whenever possible, schedule time between meetings and leave your evenings free so you can refuel throughout and at the end of each day. Resist the urge to bring too many projects home over the weekends.

5. Share responsibilities – No matter how efficient you are, there is only so much you can accomplish in one day. If you’re a manager, make sure that you are delegating appropriately instead of trying to do everything yourself. Doing so will reduce your workload and help your staff build their skills.