Are working moms a good or bad thing for society?
What kind of numb-nut question is that?
No less vaunted an organization than the Pew Research Center asked that question. Here are the results:
Pew concludes:
In the span of the past decade, full-time work outside the home has lost some of its appeal to mothers. This trend holds both for mothers who have such jobs and those who don’t.
Among working mothers with minor children (ages 17 and under), just one-in-five (21%) say full-time work is the ideal situation for them, down from the 32% who said this back in 1997, according to a new Pew Research Center survey. Fully six-in-ten (up from 48% in 1997) of today’s working mothers say part-time work would be their ideal, and another one-in-five (19%) say she would prefer not working at all outside the home.
Not only is this “debate” boneheaded, it’s also damaging to the already strained psyches of the 75% of women ages 25 to 54 who work. That’s right, three out of four of us participate in the labor force, same as a decade ago, despite all the hoo and ha about moms opting out. There’s been a slight decline among working women with children under three–from 62% in 1998 to 59% in 2005.
Pew asks working moms and stay-at-home moms to rate themselves on their parenting skills. Here’s how they responded:
Now, is anyone surprised by this? Of course if your job is to care for your children, you’re damn well likely to give yourself higher scores on that one job than if you were juggling two. Most working parents I know feel they’re not acing either of their two roles. The thing is, to us, it’s worth it to suck a little bit at your job-job for a while so you can participate in the life of this precious new person; it’s also worth it to kiss the precious person good-bye every morning, painful as it might be, so that you can go into the world and provide for her.
I wouldn’t give myself a 10 as a parent. And I certainly wouldn’t give myself a 10 as a worker. But between me and my husband and our various caregivers, I know my child is being carefully and lovingly raised. As for work, I believe that my job as a parent informs my job as a writer, giving me more empathy for my subjects, a clearer voice, and, heck, better material.
Are working moms good or bad for society? Bah. We’re here, like it or not. Now help us cope by coming to the house and doing a load of laundry.